Oh sweet expat life - the beauty and the beast
After 8 months in my new Expat Life I would like to take the opportunity to summarize the good, the bad and the ugly 🙂 As an Expat Wife I guess I have some insights for you.
If you are thinking about starting an Expat Career/Life there could be some good insights for you. However, if you are already abroad I hope my thoughts give you some company. Also, if you have any experience on this topic feel free to share some thoughts in the comments below or send me a message. Would be great to reflect more opinions.
THE DIFFERENT PHASES
As I have studied and worked abroad before I am very familiar with the 4 phases of emotions you go through: Elation, Resistance, Transformation & Integration. There are several different articles describing these phases. All of them vary a bit with the definition but the common understanding is that moving abroad and adjusting yourself is a process. First you feel excited, then overwhelmed, things might not go as planned and the new culture is much more different than expected. Finally, you are making yourself comfortable with the new surrounding and start to adjust to your environment.
There are tons of articles on that topic. I pinned some nice blogs I came across on my Pinterest Account. I have linked their posts so check it out to learn more.
Nonetheless, I have the feeling that each phase has its good and bad parts and it is not the goal to rush through all these phases very quickly to reach the final step called INTEGRATION. Rather you should take your time with each phase and experience it to the fullest.
Every stage has its good and its bad vibes. Even the last stage integration has its down parts as you are finally feeling home but most likely have to go to a different place soon to start all over again.
EXPAT LIFE – A FRIEND WITH TWO FACES
I call the Expat life a friend with two faces. A friend because this life is a welcomed new companion and I enjoy spending time with him. Maybe it will even become a long-lasting relationship. 
I call it a friend with two faces as each day he offers me another angle.
I was well aware of what to expect and was looking forward to get familiar with this new life. The great side of being an Expat: You have so many new opportunities. Everything is upside down. Everything feels so new and ready to be explored by you. Right?
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THE FRIENDLY FACE OF BEING AN EXPAT WIFE
This friendly face of the Expat Life broadens your horizon. It lets you meet many new people. It changes your mindset, values and believes in a good way. It opens your eyes to so many new facets of life.
I often imagine myself traveling the world and taking back home (wherever that is) all the positive things. In that way I would be able to create my very own culture.
With the friendly face, you start your day with a ‘I can do’ attitude. You sign up to charities and networking sites. You go out and explore new neighborhoods. You upload pictures on Instagram showing how much you love your new city. And for sure, you really mean it. Cultural differences are interesting and exciting to you. Basically, you try to absorb every inch of this new lifestyle. You really like to figure out what life on the other side of the planet is like. Personally, I appreciate it so much that I don’t know what the future might bring. It excites me that I am here now without planning it and I wonder where I would end up next. I kind of enjoy this uncertainty as it makes my life and the opportunities seem endless.
THE GRUMPY FACE OF BEING AN EXPAT WIFE
The other side however leaves you behind with a big question mark. You check your emails and nobody replied to your applications. You want to volunteer but there are no free spots for weeks. You go out to the supermarket and adopting to the new culture you start with the learned small talk: Hey, how are you? Nice weather, right? Oh, I love the sweater you are wearing. But all you get back on that day is: Aha, its 5.99 dollars.
I know, this can be frustrating. I guess this is typical for the phase I am in right now after 8 months abroad. I started to adopt myself but not have understood the concept by the fullest. I guess, I am still making a fool of myself from time to time but that is alright.
WHEN THE GRUMPY FACE IS A PAIN IN THE A**
Bad days are normal and make you worship the good things even more. However, if you have just moved abroad and have not started a job yet you will be missing the routine of a daily life. This often so hated daily routine makes it easier for us to cope with bad days as it keeps our mind busy. And I guess we all agree that there isn’t anything worse than having a bad day with an empty schedule. When your brain has too much time to think you start to ask yourself frustrating questions and make yourself wonder why you are doing this.
I personally hate those days as it feels like someone pushed the slow mode button. I hate the thought that I am wasting my potential and nothing works out.
THE SECRET IS…
True, it takes a lot of energy to go out there presenting yourself to a new environment every day. You constantly offer your volunteer work, ask for a job, even ask for friendship and it is definitely not easy. It might be simple for a very talented sales person who likes to market themselves (somehow every American I met so far). However, for people like me it’s a wired feeling to make that approach all the time.
Therefore, I am making the most out of the good days. On these days I am more outgoing, taking more risk than normal. Really, I am doing everything: Approaching new people, contacting all the persons I met so far, setting up endless profiles on all the social platforms out there. Even writing applications to jobs I could only dream of. And so on. You don’t want to try this with the grumpy face of Expat Life in your back. It would just not work out.
iF YOU DON’T ASK - NOBODY WILL KNOW
The important thing is that you should not stay at home, quietly complaining why nothing works out. You have to let the world know that you are out there. It might sound silly but actually I found out that lots of Expat women forget or underestimated that.
You can have a perfect CV, a nice smile but as long as you don’t ask for it nobody will come to your place like Santa unfolding all the opportunities that are out there.
One of my mistake: I misunderstood the whole volunteering market. I thought it would be the easiest thing. I mean, come on, I am offering my time and skills for free and I am 100% motivated to support the good cause. However, it turned out more difficult than I thought. I ended up signing in for so many projects and hardly heard back. Either there were no spots open or the introduction for new volunteers is too far in the future. This is still strange for me. I have the feeling that there would be so many interesting projects out there but I just don’t know them.
My learning: The whole volunteering as well as the job market is more organized over a personal network than the world wide web.
SO AGAIN, THE ANSWER IS: PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE AND ESTABLISH A NETWORK.
Not so easy as it sounds but not impossible! I would be very interested to know how you are establishing a network in a foreign country. Let me know in the comments below. I will post an article about that as soon as I have succeeded in this task to share my wisdom.
In the meantime, check out my other posts about being an Expat Wife if you are interested. Have you seen my free download motivation chart? Also, there is a post about how to decide on your next step.
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I was going through a rough time in my life and it greatly affected my union with my wife. We had so many emotional problems and struggles and this alone made us pay less attention to each other’s need. While i was on it trying to fix my problems and get back on my feet so that i can reshape my marriage and make it work better, my wife had women around her that influenced her wrongly and made her took the wrong part by walking away. That incident alone broke me and i was sure she wasnt doing everything she doing with her right senses. I did what i can to restore peace but it never worked and i had to Contact Dr Isikolo who made it possible for me fix the problem. He worked for me and restored back the love and connection between me and my wife and she returne back home. The result of his work started manifesting just after 48 hours as promised and i can bold say everything is fine between us now and we are both happy together, I am here to validate the information out there that Dr Isikolo is a good and honest man that you can trust to help you with your problems. His webpage: https://isikolo-temple.com, and you can as well text him via WhatsApp +234-8133261196.
A Personal Review On How a powerful Love Spell caster helped me return my partner back to me with her powerful love spell, and Reunited us after separation.
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I am so happy, i never believe i will be this happy again in life, I was working as an air-hoster ( cabby crew ) for 3years but early this year, i loose my job because of this deadly disease. called Herpes virus (HSV), I never felt sick or have any symptom, till all workers were ask to bring their doctors report, that was how i got tested and i found out that am HSV positive that make me loose my job, because it was consider as an STD and is incurable disease, i was so depress i was thinking of committing suicide, till i explain to a friend of mine, who always said to me a problem share is a problem solved, that was how she directed me to Dr OGBO, that was how i contacted him and get the medication from this doctor and i got cured for real, I just went back to my work and they also carry out the test to be real sure and i was negative. Please contact this doctor if you are herpes positive or any STD diseases his email is: drogboherbalhome@gmail.com or you can call or whatsApp his mobile number on +2348110968476
I still can’t believe this is real, but I actually won the lottery jackpot! It feels like a dream come true. For years, I would occasionally play without expecting much, just hoping that one day luck would finally be on my side—and it finally happened when I came across a testimony on how Dr Benjamin the great spell caster had helped alot of people win, so I reached out to him, he told me what to do and I followed his instructions, after 48 hours he gave some numbers to play, I did played the numbers as instructed.
The moment I checked my numbers and realized they all matched, my heart started racing. I had to double-check multiple times because I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Winning the Powerball jackpot of $107,000,000,00. This has completely changed my life. It’s given me financial freedom, peace of mind, and the opportunity to support my family and invest in my future. Here are his contact information.
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As God would have it, I was able to fix my marriage and I am forever grateful because losing my wife was something I couldn’t bear. All this happened because Dr Isikolo was there to help me fix the problem. I was separated from my wife because of cheating issues that escalated and she was torn apart and left me and the kids. It was indeed rough for me in the months that went by handling the whole parenting thing alone. I contacted Dr Isikolo and he reconciled us back together and she returned back home to me and the kids. On my own I was unable to fix it and have her back until Dr Isikolo intervened and for this, I had to also come out here and tell others about his good works. He is assured never to fail you if you are serious about fixing whatever issues you are having with your partner. You can call/text him via WhatsApp +234-8133261196 or click on his webpage and see more details about his good works. https://isikolo-temple.com
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A married woman actually planned to ruin my marriage and take my husband away from me and my kids. The whole saga began when my husband started acting weird and staying out late and sometimes doesn’t return back home. I did my findings and found out that an old friend of his, who is married was doing everything to break us. I did my best to end their closure but it wasn’t working. Dr Isikolo helped someone I knew and I got to know about him from my friend whom he helped. When I contacted him, he told me all I needed to know and all that was needed to be done to separate them. I complied and he fixed the problem and my husband is focused on me now and my kids now and assured me forever and never to let anyone come in between us. Just as I hoped for better results from Dr Isikolo and he delivered, he can help you too if you reach out to him for any kind of help. Review his page: https://isikolo-temple.com, or reach him on WhatsApp on +2348133261196
Hello viewer I have always played lottery games with the hope that someday I will win but that never happened. I did some research online and I came across an advert about DR EMWANTA who helps people that believe in his work. I explained my situation to him and he prepared a lottery spell for me and gave me some special digits to play the lottery. I did as he said without any skepticism could you believe after 3 days, I checked my ticket at the store where I bought it from and for the very first time in my life, I won the sum of $41,820,000USD. Now my life has changed for good, I am a boss of my own and I am so happy that I meant this great man called DR EMWANTA. You can be a boss of your own too by getting in touch with him. For urgent response from DR EMWANTA, WhatsApp via +1(504) 493-4932 Or Zangi 10-1579-8861 Or you can also Email him Email dremwanta@gmail.com
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Herpes is a serious and recurring disease which can’t be cured through drugs or injections by the American doctors but the best. way to deal with herpes is by taking natural herbal medicine for it, and is only few American doctors that know about this herbal medicine, from. Dr Uma.. I have read about Dr Uma the great herbalist doctor from African who can cure Herpes with his herbal medicine. for the people suffering from the following diseases Hiv, Herpes, Cancer, Herpatitis B, Diabetes, Hpv, Infections ETC should contact him for his herbal medicine because i am a living testimony and i was cured of HERPES. Although, i sent him what he requested and he sent me his medicine which i took for three weeks and when i went for test i was tested Herpes Negative. you can reach him through his email address:Dr.umaherbalcenter@gmail.com or Whatsapp +2347035619585 Thanks Dr Uma.
Get rid of all kinds of Herpes and virus infections, Diabetes, Hepatitis A B C, Menopause and HIV with Natural Roots and Herbs, i was once infected with HERPES and after using Dr UMA Herbal Medicine for couple of weeks i couldn’t trace it. anymore, i even went for checkup and my test came out Negative. Get your cure today from this wonderful herbalist, Dr. UMA.
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